Blue :(

Today I'm feeling very down on myself. Kaylee is a little over 9 months and I still can't fit into my pre-pregnancy cloths. This generally wouldn't bother me, however we are coming up on summer and I have one summer outfit that fits. It's going to be 75 today and I'm in jeans. I understand this is normal, and part of having a baby. I don't have to like it though. I've started walking a few times a week, and next week am going to start the couch to 5k program. I can't take it anymore. I can't really diet because I'm still nursing, and I'm on the depo shot and I'm sure that doesn't help either. Regardless of any of the factors that are against me losing weight, I eat healthy. I don't overeat and I'm exercising regularly. I guess I just feel stuck, for the past 3 months the scale hasn't moved more then a pound or two either way. It's frustrating.

Will I Ever Learn?

I'm not sure why I haven't learned. I woke up at a little before 4am this morning, because Kaylee needed to eat. So I get up, feed her and then proceed to check my facebook and email before going back to bed. Worst mistake of my morning, seriously. I don't understand why I don't learn, not to do this. It completely blows my mind how people can disregard and ignore their past actions. I'm not perfect, and have made my share of mistakes. I don't try and pretend they didn't happen. The absolute lack of respect is because I've seen what you are unwilling to accept took place. That's not something I can change, so I'm letting it go. As long as civil communication can be maintained I'm going to ignore the anger, that I'm receiving so I don't give it back. It's the adult thing to do.

It's quiet in the house this early with everyone in bed. I snagged one of my hubby's fleeces out of the closet, because it's a little brisk downstairs this morning. I made myself a cup of coffee and am munching on banana bread. In about 10 minutes I'll go wake the big kids up so they can shower and get ready for school. It's kind of a bummer I'm up this early, but I don't really mind. It's not like I'm completely exhausted, and I have a great life. It makes it easier to smile in the morning when really life couldn't get any better. I have an awesome husband that loves me, and three amazing kids. I love watching them grow, change and mature. I'm very proud of the people my children are becoming. They are well rounded, responsible, open, honest and happy.

So here's to another great day! Start it with a smile and end it with a smirk :).

BOB Revolution

I have what you would call a stroller addiction. Although in all fairness they are all bought with a purpose. I wish I could find one that is everything I want, and serves all purposes, but they don't. We have the stroller that came with her infant car seat. That's our go to the fair, have to bring the big diaper bag stroller. I picked up a Macleran umbrella stroller, because Jon is tall and we wanted a stroller that was light that we both could push. So we have that one, then we wanted a jogger we could run with. So I did a bunch of research and found one I liked and we ordered it. The City Mini by BabyJogger, turns out that one is a beefed up umbrella stroller and is not for running. We loved it so much that we decided to keep it, and get a real jogger once the time came where we could run. So the other day I ordered the BOB Revolution, this one is really for jogging, and it's AWESOME. It's a smooth ride for the baby and practically pushes itself. I went almost 8 miles with it today some time with the front wheel both unlocked and locked and it still pushes like a dream. If anyone is looking for a serious jogging stroller this is totally worth the large price tag. Having gone through many strollers, for running and jogging I'd have to say this is the best I've used so far.

I'm hoping the combination of the awesome stroller and Kaylee loving to ride, I can get my butt back in shape.

My next investments for this stroller are the warm fuzzy to cushion the seat and help keep her warm, and the rain shield for when it starts to sprinkle and we are 3 miles from home. I say that only because that happened to us today. I'll be better prepared next time.

Today I did what I wanted, walked and jogged with the baby. Ignored the dishes :). Had lunch, and then napped when she napped, well, because I could.

I have to do dishes tomorrow, clean up the kitchen and do some laundry. I hope to be able to walk again, assuming it isn't raining again. Then I have to take Tyler to his practice. Tomorrow they do their individual and team photos. I love my family, and am so proud of all of them.

Decluttering

It's been a week with no school. I have successfully picked up and cleaned most of the house, minus the office of course. I'm hoping that this coming weekend we will get to that. I'm not going to hold my breathe though. The kids did an awesome job helping me clean out their drawers of things that don't fit them, as well as putting all their laundry away. All the beds in the house have had the bedding changed, now to wash all the old bedding. This morning when I got up, I did dishes and picked up the kitchen, then it was laundry time. Today will be load after load of washing, drying and folding. Thankfully it's just Jon and I's stuff and the bedding. I did a load of the kids clothes over the weekend. It's a good feeling when Julie says to me, "Mom I wore that yesterday, did you wash it already?" Yes, yes I did Julie.

Since the lady that was helping me clean was doing a mediocre job and hasn't called or showed up in over a month, she's fired. I'll clean the house myself from now on till school starts. Once school starts again I may find someone else that can come twice a month at least to help with the floors, since that seems to be the hardest thing to find the time for.

Everything here in the Moses house is good. The older kids are staying busy, and loving it. Jon is enjoying his job, and I'm enjoying having the time to pick up and not have everything be cluttered. Eventually I will get to the closets, even though the thought of that makes me shudder just a little. They aren't terrible, but there are a few that I don't look forward to having to deal with. Sadly the time will come where I have to. I'm thinking for the office closet that time will come when the air conditioner needs to be put in upstairs, because currently that unit is in the office closet. I hope to have the house organized completely by the time I go back to school, this will make maintaining it easier, especially since I don't have a cleaning lady anymore.

As things continue to stay busy around here with the kids after school activities. I look forward to Tyler's first soccer tournament. He's gotten so good at the game this year. I contribute that to his awesome dedicated coaches. He's gained a lot of confidence in himself in the last 3 months or so, and it's nice to finally see him not so angry at life. I also look forward to Julie's recital. She's worked so hard, and is very good at it. I hope to see her continue with it during the school year next year. We will see though, both kids this summer want to try something new and attend summer camp.

It's been a great year so far. I don't expect the second half will be anything less then that.

Summer Vacation

I am officially on summer break, and let me tell you what it is AWESOME!!! I did 1 load of laundry today, and took care of baby. When she napped I read. Yes you all heard me right, I read a book, that wasn't a school book. How weird is that? With my recent schedule it had been impossible to recreational read. I am thrilled to have little to no stress. I think the biggest thing that gets overwhelming is making sure the kids after school activities don't overlap. For those of you that know what I'm talking about, know that this is almost no stress at all. I love it!!!

I'm so proud of my older two. Julie earned a t-shirt in ballet class today for remembering the most when they were quizzed and for being the most engaged in class. Tyler had the option of attending additional soccer practices this week with the U12 team, and he decided to attend them, so he has practice 4 days this week. I'm so proud of the effort they put forth in not only their school studies, but their after school stuff.

I'm looking forward to my extra free time on the weekends. There will be more trips to the park, and out for walks. Life is good!!

Mother's Day!

Today is Mother's day. Yesterday Kaylee let us sleep in till 8am. Today she was up at 6am, I'll take that over 5am, but I think she thought yesterday was mother's day. So I'm getting Kaylee changed and dressed around 6:20, when it became apparent she wasn't going back to bed. Julie walks through Kaylee's room and asked me if I was going back to bed. I told her I wasn't, but I would stay upstairs for a little bit. It's a Mother's day tradition that I get breakfast in bed, so after Kaylee was dressed I went in and sat on the bed. This is something they love doing, so I figured even though I was up I wouldn't rob them of being able to give me breakfast in bed. Of course as soon as they brought it up Kaylee put her hand in the cereal. She's recently discovered feeding herself, and decided my cereal looked good. Tyler gave me a beautiful drawing with different cars on it, and Julie gave me a flower pot she decorated at school. Jon offered to take them shopping yesterday, but neither kid said they needed to go. I guess they were satisfied with what they had made me. Which is just fine by me :).  

I sent my Mom her stuff this week Thursday. It was waiting for her in the mail on Saturday, but with life being busy she didn't have time to get the mail Saturday. She will get her Mother's day stuff from me Monday. I feel for her and my Aunt today. This is their first Mother's day without their Mom. I can't even imagine what they must be feeling today, other then empty. Although it is a joy to be a Mom, the person that has taught you to be a Mom, your Mom is just as important. So as I enjoy my time with my kids today, I think of my Mom and Aunt, and hope they find peace on this day. She smiles down from heaven I'm sure, full of love and pride at her beautiful girls. Hey I bet breakfast with the angels is better then breakfast in bed ;). I love you Mom, Aunt Shelley and Grandma!

Also a few other Mom's I can't forget to mention. My Grandma Lambert, my MIL Michelle, my Grandmother In Law Bev, I hope you wonderful ladies enjoy your wonderful day. 

Plans

Well today I got some questions answered. I'm very pleased with the answers I received. They were what I expected, but it's nice to be reassured. Isn't it awesome when people think they can walk all over you and demand things from you, only to find out for sure that they can't.

I have grown to love Fridays. I'm sure you all are wondering why that is. Well, I'll tell you why, it's the only day of the week I don't have to play kid taxi. Although the kids will be home soon, I don't have to take them anywhere, and the best part? It isn't raining so they can go outside and play!!! I'm pretty sure we are not the only ones tired of the rain. Will be nice to see the sunshine this weekend. I'm ready to get out and walk again. I'm sure baby is too, she's been good though slept in till 6am this morning. That probably had something to do with her 2:30am feeding, which I'm fine with if she sleeps till 6am hahaha. She goes to bed around 5:30pm-6pm so when she was up at 2:30am she had already been asleep for 9hrs. I'll take that for sure over some of the alternatives.

Not much else is new here, school for me is over as of Monday!! YAY! I'm sure I'm not the only one that is excited for this. My family has been exceedingly patient with me always needing to do school, and not having a lot of free time. I'll will be happy to be able to give them more of my attention, they deserve it.

My awesome hubby didn't give me any crap last time about going to bed super early. I really did want to watch a movie, but knew once I got upstairs that I wasn't going to make it through one. I was beat. Kaylee's track record for sleeping in this week has been awful, and it was starting to catch up with me. Thankfully after some much needed rest I'm feeling a bit more with it today. Hopefully that means I'll have a little more patience this afternoon.

Life is good here at the Moses home. Monday after my exam I'll swing by Walmart and pick the kids up a few things they need. Julie says she needs summer pajamas, and I can't remember what Tyler said he needed, and the baby needs a couple of things as well. Nothing too extreme, but getting to that season where we need to make sure the kids have the summer stuff they need. Don't want them to wake up one morning and have it be 80 degrees and have them have nothing to wear, if you know what I mean.

We hope to do a lot this summer. The kids want to go to the Great Escape in Lake George. We are going camping in the Adirondack's with my family in July. I can't wait for that!! I miss them so much, but with my parents working and gas being through the roof, we haven't seen them much. I'm excited for the kid's birthdays this year too. Little Kaylee will be 1!! Doesn't seem possible that it's so close already. How fast a year goes by. Tyler will be turning 11, he's such a big boy and has matured so much this last year. Julie will be 9, and rapidly developing her sense of self. The kids want to go to summer camp again this year, as well as trying out Tae Kwon Do. So for this household the summer is going to be busy as well, but a whole lot of fun!!!

Sugar Toxic?

With the ever rising health issues in our society today, it has got me thinking a little more seriously about what we eat. I read an article: http://www.nytimes.com/2011/04/17/magazine/mag-17Sugar-t.html?_r=3&pagewanted=all

The article above outlines how dangerous added sugars are to our system. Having shopped since reading this I can tell you that they are in just about everything we buy.  From cereals, cookies and cakes, to BBQ sauce and preserves, these hidden sweeteners could be the root of many diseases our society is currently suffering from. Some of you may think I'm a hippy for this, but it's scary to think we are poisoning ourselves simply by eating something that tastes good. So last time I went shopping I didn't by anything with High Fructose Corn Syrup or Corn Syrup and attempted to avoid things with a lot of added sugar. I bought a lot of organic low sugar stuff and produce, lots and lots of produce. Oddly this was accepted well in my house, the kids are eating for fruits and veggies and reaching less and less for the processed sugary foods. They both pack their lunches most days heres what they packed today. Julie had a tuna sandwich on whole wheat bread, an apple, an orange and raw broccoli and cauliflower. Tyler had a peanut butter and jelly (trying to find a jelly substitute), cucumber slices, strawberries and goldfish crackers. I would rather take the extra time to pack their lunches, so I know they are eating healthy then have them eat at school and not know what they are putting in their little bodies. I don't go crazy with this, they eat school lunch a few times a week, they are still kids and need to not feel restricted. I think you get the idea though.

Making a change even if it is a small one, takes time and persistence, but this one I feel will be worth it for my health and my families health.

Update.

As Mother's day rapidly approaches I find myself like every year, regretting I don't live closer to my Mom. I wish that I could see her more, along with the rest of my family that lives in that area. Recently events and circumstances have made that difficult. I hope to make a trip that way soon though. I know this year is going to be difficult for both my Mom and my Aunt, as this is the first Mother's day without their Mom (my Grandma). I wish there were words to help, but there are none. There is nothing anyone can say to easy the grieving and pain of missing a loved one.

Things around here are busy lately. Tyler is in Vermont Voltage Soccer League again this year, and the outdoor season has just started. Practices twice a week Mondays and Wednesdays 5-6:30pm. They both do track on Wednesday from 3-4pm. Julie still has ballet Tuesdays and Thursdays, though doing her hair since her recent cut has been challenging. The only day around this house that we don't play kid taxi is on Friday's.

School for me is ending soon, which I'm thrilled about. Looking forward to my summer break with family.